Holiday Gift Review: ICM Reminds Employees The Best Years Of Their Lives Are Slowly Ticking Away

Our latest holiday gift report comes from an ICM staffer who considerately provided us with this brief review and photo of the company's small (estimated retail value: $3.95) token of appreciation for its employees, which doubles as a subtle reminder that as long as one is part of the ICM family, all of one's time belongs to the agency:

Good luck re-gifting the ICM employee Christmas present this year. Here's a photo. Notice the protective plastic applied not over the face of this cylindrical 2" made-in-China travel alarm, but on the ICM logo on the cap. ICM employees are so happy, they never need to check the clock, but any excuse to carry the company logo around when they travel is good enough for them. Too bad ICM's not generous enough to give a holiday party where employees can actually bring a date.

While not the most generous possible gift, the clocks do seem to have significant practical applications: if hurled at the head of an assistant, they're heavy enough merely to hurt, not maim, and the timepiece's Chinese-manufactured chassis ticks loudly enough to remind even the most unambitious of desk slaves of every second of his life he's wasting maintaining the call sheet of a guy who says "dude" way too much, a sure motivator to work a little harder for that promotion.

After the jump, photographic evidence that UTA did not, as we feared, merely recycle leftover chocolate for this year's Lucky Bars (estimated retail value of Golden Ticket-free bars: $1.29)--or if they did, they at least had the good sense to have stale candy spruced up in snappy new packaging: