Obamamania: David Geffen Declares War On Hillary

Not content to demonstrate his Democratic kingmaking power by throwing a beachside cocktail party/Hillary Clinton effigy burning for Hollywood Chosen One Barack Obama on the pristine sand behind his Malibu compound last night, DreamWorks activist David Geffen granted the NY Times's Maureen Dowd an exclusive fireside chat, during which the power-mad billionaire stroked an overfluffed white cat while cackling his way through his plans to destroy his presidential-hopeful nemesis. The column is behind a subscriber wall, but here are some of the thoughts Geffen shared with Dowd about Hillary, Bill, the political hot water in which Steven Spielberg finds himself submerged for going along with the Obama fund-raiser, and his luxurious sleeping quarters:

"Not since the Vietnam War has there been this level of disappointment in the behavior of America throughout the world, and I don't think that another incredibly polarizing figure, no matter how smart she is and no matter how ambitious she is -- and God knows, is there anybody more ambitious than Hillary Clinton? -- can bring the country together.

"Obama is inspirational, and he's not from the Bush royal family or the Clinton royal family. Americans are dying every day in Iraq. And I'm tired of hearing James Carville on television." [...]

"I don't think anybody believes that in the last six years, all of a sudden Bill Clinton has become a different person," Mr. Geffen says, adding that if Republicans are digging up dirt, they'll wait until Hillary's the nominee to use it. "I think they believe she's the easiest to defeat."

She is overproduced and overscripted. "It's not a very big thing to say, 'I made a mistake' on the war, and typical of Hillary Clinton that she can't," Mr. Geffen says. "She's so advised by so many smart advisers who are covering every base. I think that America was better served when the candidates were chosen in smoke-filled rooms." [...]

Did Mr. Spielberg get in trouble with the Clintons for helping Senator Obama? "Yes," Mr. Geffen replies, slyly. Can Obambi stand up to Clinton Inc.? "I hope so," he says, "because that machine is going to be very unpleasant and unattractive and effective."

Once, David Geffen and Bill Clinton were tight as ticks. Mr. Geffen helped raise some $18 million for Bill and slept in the Lincoln Bedroom twice. Bill chilled at Chateau Geffen. Now, the Dreamworks co-chairman calls the former president "a reckless guy" who "gave his enemies a lot of ammunition to hurt him and to distract the country." [...]

I ask what he will say if he ever runs into Bill Clinton again. " 'Hi,' " he replies. And will he be upset if Hillary wins and he never gets to sleep in the Lincoln Bedroom again?

"No," he says with a puckish smile. "It's not as nice as my bedroom."

Clinton's camp has already responded in outrage, hilariously demanding that Obama return Geffen's dirty money, but the war for Hollywood's political-starfucking soul is officially on. We fear that the acrimony will continue until some sort of Solomonic compromise is reached on the Spielberg Question, perhaps with the influential director offering to tie himself to the backs of their OBAMA '08 and HILLARY 4 PREZ campaign buses and then having them driven in opposite directions, with each candidate allowed to keep whatever grisly part of his torn-asunder body is still lashed to their vehicle.